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Babbling
Sunday, October 08, 2006, 1:31 AM
Why is it i'm so depended on by my family? It's like they can't do without me. Likewise i can't do without them. But i'm always the one to do everything. When there's good food i'll have to leave it for brother. It's always him that upsets me the most. All the best are for him. Although i know that i'll be treated the same if i were the one to be outside. They tend to take it that it's my job to do things. I won't do it if not for the home. It's always liyi, liyi, liyi. I'm the one who buys groceries, who clears the bills for dad, who do up financial statements for mum, who tries to satisfy everyone but myself. I get this heart wreching feeling everytime this happens, then tears will just flow out automatically. Don't i need some appreciation/recognition for all i've done? I always get un-noticed and the take it so for granted. Just feel like leaving this house to be on my own. But i can't bear. I'm not that sort of person. Just need to vent out my unhappiness.
Talking about mooncakes, Friday was blissful with family and lanterns and mooncakes (eat till you puke)... Of course my initiative again... And we'll always have to wait for bro to get home. He's always the one who makes mum and aunt want to make soup for, who has to be present no matter what kind of occasion - big or small. I'm tired. When can i start living for myself??? Having let off some steam and crying, guess i can sleep well tonight. |
